Endgame

The Following Post was written 3/20/09: Publication delayed due to content.

Have you ever had a shock so big it immediately unhinges you from life? An event or epiphany so profound it changes your way of thinking. Things that were on your mind yesterday, don't even get a mention today. That is sort of what happened to me this week. One moment my world was going one way and the next it changed.

A lot of people are not going to understand why I made the decision I did. That's OK, it was my decision to make not theirs. Trust me it was not made lightly or on a whim. If I had this choice even two months ago it would have been different. It happened now though. Everything happens for a reason. On the surface its tough to accept. How could someone established in their career suddenly decide to leave voluntarily in this economy at this point in time? It was not easy, I assure you. As I am fond of saying though, its all about opportunity. Knowing when to recognize it and go for it. I would much rather say I tried it than to sit back everyday and wonder what it would have been like.

I love my company it gave me opportunities and experiences that I would not have received elsewhere. I know I worked with some very strong people and forged some friendships that I know will last well into retirement. Sometimes that's not enough, sometimes passions ebb, and sometimes you realize no matter how much you love something that its time to move on. Its because of that love and commitment that my company can give me one last opportunity. A chance to go back, press the reset button, maybe rediscover that path less taken. To experience a freedom I never knew I would ever have again.

Don't worry I have a plan. I have a good head on my shoulders and a strong desire to do some good in this world. When it comes right down to it, when I think about what I want to do in this world I only really have one answer. I want to help others. Now I have a chance to explore that. In the past few years I've learned alot about life, I know and feel that existing is not enough. I've seen people who are honestly passionate about what they want become successful in what they do. While they may not have much from one person's perspective; to themselves they are living richly. My faith has been tested over the years as well, and while I may not subscribe to anyone religion I believe that if a person is truly doing good, then they will be taken care of.

Long Time, No Post

Well I suppose now is as good a time as any.

So lets blog. I apologize dear reader for the lack posts. I have no real excuse. I've just been busy. One may say too busy, I have been going through this phase where I need to constantly be doing something otherwise I feel like I am missing out on something. Some think this is good others think not; I'm not sure what to believe these days. There's suddenly a lot to think about.


Two years ago I made a lot changes in my life and I don't think these next two are going to be any less eventful. Just as I feel I get a grasp on something it seems to slip away and I wonder if that is what life will always be like or have I just reached an impasse point where I just need to "evolve to the next level". So many friends I know have lost so much over the years. I've relatives who lived through the depression who didn't think it could happen again. I am beside myself when I look upon the current economic troubles.

As previous posts can attest I am a star trek fan. So for those readers like me who enjoy it I leave you with this. I feel like this hour is our "Kobayashi Maru". The question is will anyone of us be able to think of a way out of it. I don't necessarily believe in the no win scenario, so maybe its time to change the rules of the game.

I promise to write more soon but for tonight I am tired.

You Can't Go Home Again

Or should I say you can go back to college but you can't ACT like your still in college. That is if you want to be productive the next day.



I'm back from the North Country where flannel and camo never go out of style no matter what season it may be. It was a good trip albeit a little short. I went up Wednesday night to visit some friends before heading over to LSC for the "business" part of my trip. The ride of was mercifully low key highlighted by an interesting audiobook a friend of mine lent me to help pass the time. Upon approaching I noticed something on my dash. It was my ambient temperature gauge and it was reading negative 1. I didn't think it could go that low. Despite that I decided to lower the window to breath in some fresh (arctic) air and hopefully catch the sent of pine. It smelled like a Donkin Donuts. Apparently I was driving through Waterbury where the Green Mountain Coffee Roasters plant is. Oh well.

NED, Ned RYERSON???!!!!

Needle nose Ned?

So today's Groundhogs day. For a little levity around the office I played "I got you Babe" every hour on the hour. It produced the desired affect. LOL Well we are certainly in the doldrums of winter where it would appear that every day is the same. Tomorrow will show some change with some snow. If anyone wanted to know what life was like at my college they should have been watching the weathermen the past couple of days. Seriously the only definite that I heard in the past 3 days is that there was going to be a big storm. Nor'easter quality even, but exactly what kind of precipitation and quantity eluded them just like understanding men eludes me. I mean they definitely try to figure it out and notice patterns but really they don't know until it blows up in their faces. Case in point tomorrow, who knows what we'll get until it happens, and just like 10 years ago (ugh has it been that long?) I find myself looking to the weather for the next big event for some excitement.

So to change that at lunch today I picked up every free magazine and paper I could find to patrol the ads and postings for interesting things to do. I even started posting a few on Facebook to garner interest from others who like me are looking to quell the cabin fever the season is bestowing upon us. Thanks to my friend Shawn I am looking forward to March 1. Why? Well the House of Blues has just opened up here in Boston down on Lansdown St, and that night the one, the only TOM JONES will be performing. Naturally I jumped on the tickets and was pleasantly surprised to see several other friends and a few old college pals get tickets as well. So that will be a welcomed change in the normal routine.

Apparently I need to head back to Mohegan Sun as well. Not just to play my favorite slot machine but also they gave me free slot play credits. Let me tell you they left no time between my last visit and sending out a coupon to try and get me back. Alright time to go grab the laundry.

Peace

Our Global Economic Crisis Claims Another One ...

Oh Iceland, I barely knew thee. Reykjavik was always on my list of places that I wanted to visit. Maybe some day but not now. So if the Government has failed what the hell is in its place? Is Iceland an anarchist state now? It happens to the best of us I guess. 2009 I guess is the year that job security becomes a luxury item. It has affected my immediate family and I'm sure someone you know has been affected to. Can I just tell you I think I am in shock. Enough has happened in the past two weeks and with all the stresses that have happened in it I'm feeling kind of numb. You could tell me a box of kittens was just run over in the street and I don't think it would phase me. My only fear is that I'll find myself alone one night and it will all hit me, and in case that night comes I keep a bottle of vodka under the pillow. With the exception of a few highlighted moments its been a pretty shitty January. Oh well.

February is right around the corner and bring on Groundhog Day! Not this weekend but the weekend after I get to go up to Vermont as well. Do a little visiting with friends and then its off to my old college to start my term on the Alumni Council. For those of you don't know where Lyndon State College is or for those of you want to reminisce I give you LSC-3-D.