Endgame

The Following Post was written 3/20/09: Publication delayed due to content.

Have you ever had a shock so big it immediately unhinges you from life? An event or epiphany so profound it changes your way of thinking. Things that were on your mind yesterday, don't even get a mention today. That is sort of what happened to me this week. One moment my world was going one way and the next it changed.

A lot of people are not going to understand why I made the decision I did. That's OK, it was my decision to make not theirs. Trust me it was not made lightly or on a whim. If I had this choice even two months ago it would have been different. It happened now though. Everything happens for a reason. On the surface its tough to accept. How could someone established in their career suddenly decide to leave voluntarily in this economy at this point in time? It was not easy, I assure you. As I am fond of saying though, its all about opportunity. Knowing when to recognize it and go for it. I would much rather say I tried it than to sit back everyday and wonder what it would have been like.

I love my company it gave me opportunities and experiences that I would not have received elsewhere. I know I worked with some very strong people and forged some friendships that I know will last well into retirement. Sometimes that's not enough, sometimes passions ebb, and sometimes you realize no matter how much you love something that its time to move on. Its because of that love and commitment that my company can give me one last opportunity. A chance to go back, press the reset button, maybe rediscover that path less taken. To experience a freedom I never knew I would ever have again.

Don't worry I have a plan. I have a good head on my shoulders and a strong desire to do some good in this world. When it comes right down to it, when I think about what I want to do in this world I only really have one answer. I want to help others. Now I have a chance to explore that. In the past few years I've learned alot about life, I know and feel that existing is not enough. I've seen people who are honestly passionate about what they want become successful in what they do. While they may not have much from one person's perspective; to themselves they are living richly. My faith has been tested over the years as well, and while I may not subscribe to anyone religion I believe that if a person is truly doing good, then they will be taken care of.

Long Time, No Post

Well I suppose now is as good a time as any.

So lets blog. I apologize dear reader for the lack posts. I have no real excuse. I've just been busy. One may say too busy, I have been going through this phase where I need to constantly be doing something otherwise I feel like I am missing out on something. Some think this is good others think not; I'm not sure what to believe these days. There's suddenly a lot to think about.


Two years ago I made a lot changes in my life and I don't think these next two are going to be any less eventful. Just as I feel I get a grasp on something it seems to slip away and I wonder if that is what life will always be like or have I just reached an impasse point where I just need to "evolve to the next level". So many friends I know have lost so much over the years. I've relatives who lived through the depression who didn't think it could happen again. I am beside myself when I look upon the current economic troubles.

As previous posts can attest I am a star trek fan. So for those readers like me who enjoy it I leave you with this. I feel like this hour is our "Kobayashi Maru". The question is will anyone of us be able to think of a way out of it. I don't necessarily believe in the no win scenario, so maybe its time to change the rules of the game.

I promise to write more soon but for tonight I am tired.